Greetings Around the World: Handshakes, Bows and Kisses

The first seconds of meeting someone set the tone for everything that follows, and the way people greet each other changes enormously around the world. In one country you shake hands firmly, in another you bow, and in a third you kiss someone on both cheeks before you have even said your name. Knowing the basics helps you avoid awkward moments, whether you are travelling, hosting a visitor or just curious about the people you chat with online.

The handshake and its many versions

The handshake is the most widely used greeting in business and formal settings, but it is far from uniform. In Germany and the United States, a short and firm handshake is the norm, usually with eye contact. In France, it is lighter and quicker, and people often shake hands with everyone in the room when they arrive and leave. In parts of Africa and the Middle East, handshakes can be longer, softer and sometimes continue while people talk or ask about each other's families.

The important point is that firmness does not signal the same thing everywhere. A gentle handshake is not a sign of weakness in many countries. A very strong grip, on the other hand, can feel aggressive. When in doubt, match the pressure of the other person.

Bowing

In Japan, bowing is the traditional greeting, and its depth and length show respect and social relationship. A light nod is enough for casual situations, while a deeper bow is used in formal ones. Visitors are not expected to bow perfectly, and many Japanese people will happily offer a handshake to foreigners. A small bow in return, however, is warmly received.

Bowing exists in other places as well, including Korea, where it often goes together with a handshake, and in various forms across Asia. The key is to stay relaxed and to return the gesture in a similar way.

Kisses on the cheek

In France, the cheek kiss is called la bise, and it is common among friends and family. The number of kisses varies by region, and people often disagree about whether it should be two, three or four. In Spain, two kisses are standard, starting with the right cheek. In the Netherlands, three kisses are traditional among friends. In many Latin American countries, one kiss on the cheek is a normal greeting between women and between women and men.

Often the kisses are more of a light touch of cheeks with a kissing sound than an actual kiss. If you are unsure, wait for the other person to lean in and follow their lead. It is also perfectly fine to offer a handshake if you are not comfortable.

Hands together and hands on heart

In India, the greeting namaste is made by placing the palms together near the chest and slightly bowing the head. In Thailand, a similar gesture called the wai is used, and the height of the hands and depth of the bow reflect respect. Visitors who return a wai, with the hands at a modest height, are well received.

In many Arab countries, placing a hand on the heart after a handshake is a warm sign of sincerity. The greeting as-salamu alaykum, meaning "peace be upon you", is used widely and answered with wa alaykum as-salam. In some conservative settings, men and women may not shake hands, so it is polite to wait and see whether the other person offers a hand first.

Touching noses

Among the Māori people of New Zealand, the traditional greeting is the hongi, in which two people press their noses and foreheads together briefly. It is a sign of sharing breath and respect, and it is usually part of formal welcome ceremonies. As a visitor, you should follow the lead of your hosts and never try it unprompted.

Words matter too

Greetings are not only about the body. The words people say can be just as important. "How are you?" is a simple greeting in some cultures and a real question in others. In many languages there are different greetings for different times of day, or for different levels of formality. Learning one greeting in someone's language is among the kindest things you can do, and you can practise a few with this little tool.

Greetings in online chat

When you chat online, you lose the physical side, but the same principles apply. A warm opening line, a smile emoji and a greeting in the other person's language convey friendliness. The time of day matters too: "Good morning" sent to someone who is about to go to bed can be confusing, so a neutral "Hello" is often safer when you are not sure about their time zone.

Formality is the other thing to watch. In some languages, such as Spanish, French, German and Polish, you can choose between formal and informal forms of "you". If you are unsure, start formally and let the other person invite you to relax, as we explain in our article on formal and informal "you". Our list of twenty ways to say hello is a good place to find a greeting to try.

If you get it wrong

You will occasionally misread a greeting: you offer a hand when someone bows, or you lean in for a kiss when they expected a handshake. Do not worry. People abroad are usually very forgiving toward visitors who clearly try to be respectful. A smile, a quick "sorry" and a friendly laugh solve nearly every awkward start.

The takeaway

There is no universal greeting, but there is a universal principle: show respect, watch what the other person does and follow their lead. If you remember that, you can walk into almost any situation with confidence, and you will make a good first impression wherever you go.